Don’t Nice Your Way Out Of Happiness

written by Fred Campos
Don't Nice Your Way Out

It’s unfortunate when relationships come to an end and even more so when marriages fall apart. As a husband, you may be wondering what kind of deal you will get if you were to take the plunge and start divorce proceedings. The sad reality is, it’s going to be raw. That is of course if you were to take the proper measures that will ensure you will get a fair hearing. It’s a sad fact of life, but the opposite sex tends to get more in divorces and draconian laws are still in place. The divorce laws and cultures surrounding divorce were seen as something that detrimental to the wife as previous centuries, the man was the only breadwinner. Nowadays, however, women have just as much money as men. Yet still, this culture of smash and grab against men continues.



Don’t Nice Your Way Out – Getting Ready

Do not nice yourself out of your own happiness. Although you may have been in love with your spouse and you think you know her, you never really get to know a person until you’re both in court. Do not rely on her being lenient or kind to you. The sad reality is, she will probably try to get as much from you as possible. So before you file for divorce, you should protect yourself from these potential actions. Get all the paperwork you will need ready. This means details on shared bank accounts, shared vehicles, who bought what, when, and for how much, how much have you spent on the house, how much do you and she earn? All of these questions need hard answers in the form of documents.


Don’t Nice Your Way Out – Know the Law

Some states have horrendous divorce laws whereby they literally treat the man as a second class citizen. The state of California is particularly challenging as it’s laws bend highly in favor of the woman. Chances are she will get more than 50% of your savings and assets, as long as you have been married for 18 months and lived in the state for a year to 6 months. Whichever state you live in, you should learn what the laws are and prepare a defense as early as you can. Working with your divorce attorneys, you should formulate a plan of action for a contested divorce. Uncontested divorces are when one or both parties want to agree to just halve everything down the line. Do you think this is what she will go for? Probably not, so prepare to contest your property, savings, and more.

Don’t Nice Your Way Out – Think of Your Future

You still might have feelings for your spouse but it’s vital that you start thinking beyond her and your previous life. You will need to retain as much of your wealth as possible so if you decide to get married again, you can afford to buy a new house and retain the same sort of lifestyle. Divorces are rarely smooth, but if you keep one eye on your future you will be urged to plan ahead and fight hard.

Unfortunately, divorce is never easy. If you were to enter into a divorce not contesting your property and savings, chances are you will be left in the dust as she will have done the opposite.

What additional advice would you add?


Contributed post. Feature image via Deposit Photos.



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